Episode #3×01: Third Time’s The Charm

2017 Calender on the red cubes

Welcome to 2017. Welcome to season 3. Please manage your expectations for both.
  • Happy New Year, sycophants. Two truths, one lie reveals which of us is the loser that stayed home and got drunk with her dad.
  • Wikishits announces their descent into the 6th Circle of Hell as they plan to release the private information of Twitter users. 
  • U.S. intelligence agencies have definitively concluded that Vladimir Putin ordered an “influence campaign” to sway the U.S. presidential election. “U.S. intelligence agencies clearly part of liberal propaganda wheel,” reports Breitbart. 
  • Sucks to suck: Fox News loses Megyn Kelly to MSNBC. “After our deliberate coverup of Roger Aisles’ sexual harassment, we are shocked,” said no one anywhere. 
  • Hidden from the Headlines ponders what holy angel has gotten into China lately. 
  • The Number reveals none of us know what we’re talking about. 
  • Surprise, Bitch! welcomes a traitor to the show. Thanks for nothing, Jim. 
  • What constitutes a “hate crime”? A case out of Chicago, wherein four black teenagers live streamed the torture of a white classmate, has the country asking. 
  • New year, new laws: we take a look at the laws going into effect around the country this year, including a tax on sugar and a change in online shopping. 
  • Help us, Ruth Bader Ginsburg. You’re our only hope. 

To listen to Episode #3×01, update your iTunes/RSS feed (here’s more on how to listen), directly download the file, or use this player: